Her Heart Grew 3 Sizes That Day

To be honest... I was a little bummed the week leading up to my 30th Birthday.  One, because this is a huge milestone birthday and you are "supposed" to so something wild and crazy with your girlfriends or something.... ( not that I even do wild and crazy!!) I've made a few girlfriends since I've been out here in BC... But none that know me enough to really celebrate and all who have their own tight circle of sisters .. also, its like a few days before Christmas and everyone is going away or busy...
Two, because all my family and friends are back in Calgary or Manitoba.  I've actually kept in such horrid contact this past year with everyone, and missed everyone's birthdays (which I have never done before!) that I didn't expect anyone to really remember mine.... 

Oh my gosh, I sound like I'm 10.... and a little (lot) bitter!

Deep down, I was expecting to be forgotten... not by Trevor though, oh no!!   I had made it very apparent that he could not forget me.... Actually, sadly, all the pressure to "make me feel special on my 30th" fell on him... He was a little stressed to say the least.... I realized this about 3 days ago, when God shone a light in my heart and I realized that I was trying to control to make sure that I was loved and not forgotten (very draining on Trev... and me!)  It's funny, that when I was finally (after many tears under my covers) able to trust my heart and my birthday to God, and let Him minister His Love and thoughts toward me, I was able to release Trevor,  I felt peace.... Peace to be okay no matter what did or didn't happen... it was really cool.

Anyway, to say that I was blown away yesterday, is to say the least.  I was humbled by the words, gifts, and phone calls.  I was humbled by the thoughts that came out to me yesterday... especially by my husband!

Trev had to work, but I woke up to a birthday kiss and cuddle (Sigh)

Followed by texts from Carl (my brother), Kathy (my sis), and Karlie (one of my besties)

Then, once I got out of bed, I sat at the table and decided to open 2 gifts that I got sent to me.  I actually pictured Jesus sitting with me (He knows I love Presents and cards!) I didn't feel alone!

Text from my brother in law Chris

Text from my dear childhood friend Missy

The first gift was from my friend Jenna (in Nova Scotia).  She sent me a card filled with beautiful words and a dark chocolate bar.  Her gift was so precious to me because she took the time and effort so that I would feel loved and thought of.   Really touched me!

Then I opened the gift from my mother and father in law.  You have to know something about my mother in law, she is the most thoughtful gift giver.  Everything was wrapped and butterflied (She has remembered that I loved butterflies from the first Christmas I spent with them (even before Trev and I were married) All my gifts have a butterfly theme... (like all!) and I love it!
Inside the butterfly box was a candle (with butterflies), a Christmas ornament that said "Believe in Miracles!" (she has single handidly filled our Christmas tree with ornaments too!), and a new Pandora charm for my bracelet.  It was a dangley one with an angels wing and a pearl (exactly what I had wanted!)  Beyond any of the gifts that they gave me, the most significant, and meaningful, was her words in my (Butterfly) card.

I think her words impacted me so very much, because I have always struggled with not feeling good enough for Trevor's mom.  She is an amazing woman.  Hard working, she sews and cooks, she worked full time while raising two boys.  Her house is always immaculate.  She's beautiful and successful, and wise.  She's like freaking Super Woman!
I feel like on so many levels, I don't measure up to her.  For one, I don't work.  Her and Bob worked so hard and paid their house off so young. I know that they want that for Trev and I..... hard to do when I'm not working.... I guess I carry guilt from my not quite tall enough measuring stick.
Her words touched me.  I sat at the table and cried.  I needed to hear that so much... more than she knew!

Phone call from my mom

Email from Judy (mother in law)

Email from Bob (father in law)

Text from Matt (Trevor's dear friend from high school who has become my dear friend)

Went out to Starbucks (with a Starbucks card from Linda, our dear beautiful friend) Drank a never before had (by Christina) Peppermint Moka.. With Whip!

Also, It's Dec 21 and there are Pansies.... Pansies outside!!

Headed to Ardene's where I bought 2 pairs of knee high socks (for under my boots), a ring, and red and gold nail polish.

On my way home, stopped in at a new boutique.... Got talking with the woman at the till (I was the only one in the store)  We must have talked for half an hour.  She just got back from Africa.  She and her husband have a soccer ministry for helping orphaned children... I could have listened to her stories all day!!

Came home, painted my nails red (with one finger gold, even though I said I would not succumb to that fashion craze) Listened to Brene Brown interview on U Tube "The Power of Being Vulnerable"

Actually (almost) sat long enough for all my nails to dry (what do you think of that Kendra!!  Proud of me hey?)

Trev came home early.  I didn't know what he had planned.  All I knew was to be ready when he got home and have a nap.

Opened his gift that he's been working on for a few weeks prior.  It came wrapped with words from his heart written all over the paper, and a .99 voucher for me to buy an upgrade on a photo app that I've been wanting (small gift, but HUGE to me... and sooooo thoughtful!)

It was a picture book of our year in BC.  It was so beautiful and made with so much detail and attention.  He didn't miss a thing, a moment or event!  I will cherish this book forever!

Talked to my mother and father in law

Then we were off to watch Twilight (which I'd been waiting to see... lame I know!)..... also meant alot that Trev chose this movie... well... because it means Trevor would have to sit through 2 hours of Edward, Jacob, kissing, and awkward Love scenes.... What a man I have!!!

Trev bought me a Yo gen Fruz! (Which I didn't need.... but, its like some kind of a law that I always have to get one when I'm at the theatre)

Random Text from our awesome friends Steve and Beth (from Calgary) who we usually go to see Twilight movies with... (this was the first we'd seen without them, but they text ed right as the movie was starting... so weird!)  We usually just spend the movie laughing and and making fun...

Went out for Sushi, at a place Trevor had done his research and found (We had both never really tried it before... so it was an adventure!)

It was really good.... but we ordered way too much food!

And I'm wearing my new sweater that Trevor got me!

Phone call and Text from Kendra (My dear friend)

Text from Loretta (Making sure I was planning on eating chocolate today!.... YUP!)

My dad hadn't called all day, and I actually thought he forgot ( I was trying not to feel hurt).... But when we got out of the movie, He had left a message... Sigh.... all is well!

Came home to find that Trev had got the stuff to continue on the Shirley (my maiden name) family birthday cake tradition that my dad started when we were kids.

You take a tub of ice cream, dump it out, and cover it with chocolate, peanuts, smarties, strawberries.... whatever you want, and everyone just digs in with a spoon.... So awesome!!

We were both too full to do that when we got home, but we'll most likely do that tonight!

Sooooo.... we "went to bed" (wink wink... oh man... I hope my dad never reads this blog... I would just die if he read that!)

Text from my sister in law Tanya.  They had also gotten me a birthday present a month ago when she came out.  It was a book about Australia for Trev and I to use when we get there (soooo needed!) and a  cute book.   It's just a fun fact insomnia journal... made me smile...  (Her and Chris are also super thoughtful and creative gift givers!!)

Also, I forgot to mention that I had been craving DQ dilly Bars for like 3 weeks... So on our life group Christmas Party last week, Trevor surprised me with Dilly Bars and one wrapped in the box,  especially for me, with ribbon and a note!! It was sooooo sweet!!

All in all, I had an amazing day!

I got 56 messages on Facebook with beautiful words and thoughts.... from those I  did expect to write and those I  didn't even consider that they would take the time to write...... Filled my heart!

I guess I kind of feel like the Grinch today.  I was expecting to feel lonely and forgotten (deep down) and I was a little (lot) bitter..... but my heart has grown        ( 3 sizes today)  by the surprising display of Love and care that I felt.

I am overwhelmed and humbled.  Makes me realize the impact that taking a few minutes to write someone a note or send them a card or text, or do something thoughtful,  can make such a huge impact on their day.... and life!

Today was not about all the gifts and making sure that "special things" happen for Christina.  It was about me realizing how very much relationships matter in my life.  How much loving and being loved is the bottom line of everything that means anything to me!

This makes me laugh so so hard!!!  He cries like me!!! Also, that is what happens when Trevor feels!!

Lesson learned Christina!!

I may have shared a lot of details, in this post, that may not seem relevant to others ... but every ounce of this day is precious to me and I wanted to document it and breathe it in.

Thank you everyone for reminding me that I am Loved!

Thanks you, God, for knowing what I needed today..... and always doing exceedingly, abundantly, more than I could ask or imagine!

XOXOXO